The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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