The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
as a side note pls kill me
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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