p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
