Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
