had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
