you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
