I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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