windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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