well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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