and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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