it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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