I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
