I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
as a side note pls kill me
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