I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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