I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
