i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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