Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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