I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
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