I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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