Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
