so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
