Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
