Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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