But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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