when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
