Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
