3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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