check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
You've changed since you got that strap on
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Randomize
