$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
