i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
