I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Randomize
