Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
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