I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
