its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
