You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
