Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
