Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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