My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
and she was petting her beer can
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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