so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
