good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
