Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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