I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
