I hate all girls vehemently.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
