At least make sure they are 18
Why
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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