she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
