Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
