awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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