My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
