Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
