ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
